Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Making way for myself

Another confession today, in that i don't get out of my own way. I'll explain:

We recently took a trip back to the St Louis area to visit with friends. I love St Louis, in so much that I would move tomorrow if I could and take up residence there again. As we were preparing for the trip I was asked 'what do you want to do?'. I simply said the same thing I always do, which is 'I don't care, whatever you want to do'. In fact, I wanted to do several things and I didn't want to seem like a bother or inconvenience asking so I simply did not get to enjoy those things.
I thought a lot over the weekend about my attitude and realized the problem is with me. I am not a 'pleaser' by nature, but that seems to be the thing I am doing the most lately. What I should have said was 'I want to do x, y and z', but instead I just kept my mouth shut and went with the flow. DON'T GET ME WRONG, I had a great time. I just think I would have enjoyed doing something on my wish list.
So now we are going back the end of the month. I get to go for a motorcycle ride with my Pastor, hang out with some friends, see the zoo, and hopefully take in the Cardinals game. I would not have gotten this chance to go back if I had been so pushy in the first place, but God blessed me with more time off to enjoy with my friends back home in St Louis.